Are these really real entries from your housemate’s diary?
I don’t believe you.
That’s OK – I’m not out to con anyone. You can think what you want. Enjoying the site is the main thing.
If they are real, then what the hell’s wrong with you? You can’t put them online!
It’s too late, I’ve done it.
Does your housemate know you’ve done this?
No, and if you know him don’t tell him that I have! It would end badly for me if he finds out.
Do you like your housemate?
Yes, very much so. He’s a nice guy (once you get to know him). He’s also very funny, which is why reading his private thoughts is so enjoyable.
Where does he hide his diary?
It’s more about where he hides the key to his bedside cabinet (in his wardrobe). All his diaries are in there.
How many diaries are there?
Lots, they go back years… although they aren’t written in proper diaries that you buy, just notebooks, so they’re more of a journal I guess – unfortunately it’s too late to change the name.
How did this all start?
The way things often do – as revenge!
Revenge for what?
Can you upload a picture of Gareth?
Hell no! Then he’ll definitely find out. I will occasionally Tweet some Gareth related images and also put them on the Facebook page, so ‘follow/like’ to enjoy them – there’s already a picture of two boiled eggs and you wouldn’t want to miss out on that. He also does all sorts of scribbles over the diaries, little drawings and so on – they’re pretty shit, so those will definitely go up every now and then.
If you’re so worried about getting caught, why haven’t you changed anyone’s names?
How do you know I haven’t?
What happens if he finds out?
I’m in trouble! Also, I think it’s a matter of when, rather than if.
Why keep doing it if you risk getting a kicking?
The site’s been going for a few years now, I never thought I’d keep it going for that long. It turns out people really enjoy the roller-coaster ride that is Gareth’s life and keep coming back for more. Closing the site down isn’t an option now, I have too many people dependent on updates, so my only option is to make Gareth a legion of fans, so that when he finds out, I can present them to him and he’ll see that he’s a hero. He might use his army of followers to give me a kicking, I guess.
Why don’t you get it published?
I’ve been approached by a couple of publishers. They thought it wasn’t real. When they found out it was they walked away – it’s a copyright nightmare.
Why don’t you publish it yourself?
It’s already on this site, so who would buy it? Also, I don’t have time to work out how.
Is Hannah as fit as Gareth portrays her?
Why have you started the entries from 1st April 2009 on this site?
No particular reason other than it’s the first entry I read and it made me laugh, so I thought it was as good as any date to start.
Are you still adding new entries? It’s February 2016 and you’re only on 2010!
Yes I am. I will continue to do so until I no longer have access to his diaries (if he or I move out/he or I die in some way).
How often do you add new entries?
At the moment there is an update every week (of a varying amount of days). To get more entries I have to wait for him to go out, steal the diary and transcribe it – which takes some time. I’ve got a load stockpiled at the moment, but sometimes I run out if I don’t get enough access.
Why don’t you take photos of/scan the diaries and then transcribe them at your leisure?
I’ve tried this, and yes it did mean I could transcribe at my leisure, but it also felt like I constantly had homework to do, and that’s boring. This way, if Gareth’s about, I don’t have to feel bad about not doing any work on it. Also, I like the danger element. Only nearly been caught twice. Also, this site is just a bit of fun, everything else comes first, so sometimes I just don’t get around to doing things with it (which is why occasionally months pass with no updates).
How do I find out when you have added more?
In the words of that clothed rat from the adverts – ‘Simples!’ Either check back here every so often, follow the site on Twitter using the button on the right, stick your email in the subscribe box (mails may go in your junk box though, so keep on the lookout for it), or ‘Like’ the official Facebook page (click on the button at the bottom and it will take you there).
How do I get one of those My Housemate’s Diary T-shirts or badges you give away?
I often announce random giveaways. To be notified when, Follow on Twitter, like the Facebook page and subscribe.
I love this site, how can I help?
I need money, and lots of it… no, not really. If you like the site then help to promote it – help make Gareth unknowingly famous! Tweet the URL, or retweet my Tweets. Like all the pages on this site. Like the official Facebook page. Tell your friends – send emails or Tweets or pigeons if that’s what you’re into. If you’re a member of a forum, any forum, tell the other members about the site – I’ve had people coming from all sorts of places.
How can I get my question answered in the FAQs?
Any way you like. Send me an email, post a comment below, Tweet me or use any other form of communication.